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This was a lesson that I learned from my current beau of 2 years.He emphasized the need to progress slowly, pausing along the way like divers coming from the deep.
As you list your “must haves,” try not to censor them; your subconscious may know more about what you need than your rational mind does at this point.You may be surprised to realize that there are aspects of your ex that you want again or perhaps characteristics that were not important before but are now.For me, my ex was never a match for me physically (I’m not talking about intimacy here; we were an excellent match in the bedroom). Their answers help me tailor a program that helps them attract their ideal match. But when a man rushes sex, women often feel objectified. Are they unknowingly putting up guards that turn men off?
You may feel that the true you is unlovable and seek to change your identity.